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Men with Female Best Friends. What are the benefits and drawbacks?

Best Friend Shirts - Benefits and Drawbacks About Men with Female Best Friends

Benefits and Drawbacks About Men with Female Best Friends

Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. – Best Friend Shirts

Best Friend Shirts - Benefits and Drawbacks About Men with Female Best Friends
Benefits and Drawbacks About Men with Female Best Friends

Benefits:

  • Understand/see things from the other gender’s perspective
  • Advice on friendships/relationships
  • Make other friends of opposite gender, introduced to new friend groups
  • Lots of similar likes and dislikes, yet learn new things from the other person being the opposite gender
  • Insight into living life as the other gender
  • Your partner can become friends with your best friend as well. If both sides are mature and don’t get jealous of the other.
  • Your best friend can improve your dating life by helping you meet other potential partners. This only works if your best friend is willing to help you and doesn’t feel threatened by a new person in your life.
  • You are more understanding of your partner having friends of the opposite gender, because you have them as well. You should trust your partner not to cheat with them and Vice versa.

Drawbacks:

  • Each other’s partners don’t usually like the best friend. My friend’s girlfriend doesn’t like me, even though I never think of my friend in a romantic way. If you have an especially jealous partner, they will not like your best friend and see them as a threat simply because they are of opposite gender. Also the best friend needs to learn to give the couple some space.
  • People constantly say “you should date!” Even though you have a clearly platonic relationship, and have zero attraction to the other.
  • People assume you are dating (if not already suggesting it) just because you talk to each other a lot. Some people assume that for a boy and girl to be close, they must have crushes on each other. This isn’t the case. My friend and I are both dating other people and are supportive of the others’ relationships.
  • The media and movies have it wrong. Just because someone of the other gender is your best friend, does not mean, you both are destined to date or be romantic. There is always this constant pressure which is annoying. You can’t force a romantic attraction. It should come naturally.
  • Your best friend can harm your dating life in a way, by scaring off potential partners, who don’t want to compete with your best friend for your attention. They might assume your best friend is already your bf.
  • Your best friend might become jealous of your partner because they take time away from them. (Or Vice versa)

Most importantly, make sure your relationship with your best friend is clearly platonicBe sure to set boundaries with your friend. For example, hugging may be ok, but kissing is too far … going into the romantic relationship realm. If romance is what you both want, then go with it I guess. Personally, I believe a sturdy friendship should stay a sturdy friendship. Romance makes things a lot more complicated. If you want to take it to the next level be aware that your friendship probably won’t go back to the way it was before.

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